@nbaresdev
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@nbaresdev we’re bald deep in research
Trending short videosPredicting NBA finals with absurd metric
The edit1 shot · 4 text
Shots Text1:21
Performance
- Views
- 262K
- Likes
- 15.8K
- Comments
- 115
- Engagement
- 6.1%
- Outlier
- 9.3×
- Length · 20 May 2026
- 1:21
Video #29903 · Skit
Predicting NBA finals with absurd metricfrom @nbaresdev
[01]
Overview
The creator and his colleagues humorously predict the NBA Finals by creating and applying a satirical advanced metric: the number of bald players and coaches on each team. They analyze the Eastern and Western conference matchups on a whiteboard, debating the merits of a single 'superstar' bald player versus 'bald depth,' ultimately crowning the San Antonio Spurs as champions for having the most bald players.
[02]
Simple outline
- 1State absurd premise
- 2Systematically apply premise
- 3Introduce complicating rules
- 4Debate nuanced application
- 5Declare final winner
[03]
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Classification
[05]
Hook analysis
What stops the scroll in the first 3 seconds
Title hook · 55%
WE CORRECTLY PREDICTED THE NBA FINALS - PART 1 -
Verbal hook · 10%
We correctly predicted the NBA finals. Part one.
Visual hook · 35%
A man with a mustache and glasses stands in front of a whiteboard with a hand-drawn basketball playoff bracket, immediately establishing the context of sports analysis.
[07]
Hook and payoff
The promise the opener makes, and how the video pays it back
Hook
A bold, counter-intuitive claim is made, immediately followed by the reveal of an absurdly simple and nonsensical methodology for proving it.
Payoff
A final, definitive call-to-action that frames the absurd exercise as a legitimate, ongoing series of analyses, encouraging viewers to follow for more.
[08]
Narrative framework
The structural pattern this video runs on
Framework
The Absurd Metric Gauntlet
Predicting an outcome or ranking items based on a single, ridiculous, and arbitrarily applied criterion, which is treated with mock seriousness as a form of 'advanced analytics'.
- 1
The Absurd Thesis Statement
The central, ridiculous premise is presented as a serious, data-driven analytical framework.
- 2
The First Gauntlet
The framework is applied to the first set of competing items, establishing a baseline and demonstrating the core evaluation process.
- 3
The Rule Expansion
A complication or loophole is introduced to the initial rule set, allowing for a more 'interesting' or unexpected outcome and demonstrating the arbitrary nature of the logic.
- 4
The Second Gauntlet
The now-expanded framework is applied to a new set of items, often introducing a 'star' item that perfectly fits the criteria.
- 5
The Depth vs. Star Power Debate
A new, more complex analytical layer is invented on the spot (e.g., 'depth,' 'intention,' 'quality over quantity') to resolve a difficult comparison, deepening the parody of serious analysis.
- 6
The Final Showdown & Logic Collision
The winners from previous rounds are pitted against each other, forcing a final judgment between the different, often contradictory, logics used to select them.
- 7
The Final Prediction & Reiteration of Thesis
The ultimate winner is declared with unearned confidence, and the original absurd premise is restated as scientifically proven.
Themes
Techniques
Post caption
we’re bald deep in research
Text overlays
title · beginning
WE CORRECTLY PREDICTED THE NBA FINALS - PART 1 -
branding · throughout
@NBPA
branding · throughout
NBA R&D
call-to-action · end
Follow @nbaresdev to see more of our predictions.
Transcript
Correctly predicted the NBA finals. Part one. Our first advanced metric is ball players per team. Let's start in the East. How many ball players are on the Cavs? He has hair. I mean, he's cool. Okay. I don't think there's a single ball player on the Cavs. That's insane. How many ball players the Knicks have? Pollock will be bad one day. But not today. But not today. I know who is Baldwin. The head coach of the New York Knicks, Mike Brown. The Knicks are going to the championship. Yippee. Okay. Who are they playing? Bald players on OKC. Alex Worse, Alex Caruso. Alex Caruso. I mean, he's kind of the quintessential bald guy of the league. Alex Caruso. Alex Caruso. The Spurs. Jordan McLaughlin's bald. Is MacGiambo? He's bad. Okay. This is tough. So OKC has one bald that's Wait. Why is this tough? It's two to one, but they're not completely balled, and Caruso is the baldest guy in the league. You can't win a basketball game with one star. It's about who has the most depth. Who has the most ball depth? Who who's the most ball deep? Ball deep? You need a lot of balls on your team. You need to be ball deep this first. Probably shouldn't say it like that. Spurs are ball deep. No there you have it, guys. The Spurs are going to the finals against the Knicks. It's Spurs Knicks. What's more important? Ball depth or having a ball coach? Ball coach, baby. We're locking it in. We're not changing our minds. The Spurs are gonna win the finals because they have the most bald guys. Tier heard it here first. It's all science based. Follow NBA ResDev to see more of our predictions.