@thatzonaguy
Instagram · Speaker address
@thatzonaguy I don’t make the rules I just work here . #ted #talk #present #theboys #xyzbca
Trending short videosSatirical presentation on relationship rules
The edit1 shot · 7 text
Shots Text0:43
Performance
- Views
- 2.9M
- Likes
- 184.5K
- Comments
- 1.7K
- Engagement
- 6.5%
- Outlier
- 41.3×
- Length · 12 Apr 2026
- 0:43
Video #30376 · Speaker address
Satirical presentation on relationship rulesfrom @thatzonaguy
[01]
Overview
A creator, posing as a presenter, sits in front of a TV and uses a pointer to deliver a satirical, numbered list of '5 Things that count as cheating.' He presents each absurd rule with deadpan seriousness, covering topics from answering DMs and accepting drinks to interacting with an ex.
[02]
Simple outline
- 1State a controversial thesis
- 2Present a numbered list
- 3Provide absolutist justification
- 4Reveal the ultimate item
[03]
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Classification
[05]
Hook analysis
What stops the scroll in the first 3 seconds
Title hook · 65%
If your girl does any of these it's cheating. Sorry I don't make the rules
Verbal hook · 30%
Today we have five things that count as cheating.
Visual hook · 5%
A man sits in a chair in a presenter-like pose, holding a pointer and pointing towards a presentation slide on a large TV screen.
[06]
Hook template
Steal this for your own video
If your does any of these, it's . Sorry, I don't make the rules.
- — If your financial advisor does any of these, it's fraud. Sorry, I don't make the rules.
- — If your best friend does any of these, it's betrayal. Sorry, I don't make the rules.
- — If your coach does any of these, it's sabotage. Sorry, I don't make the rules.
[07]
Hook and payoff
The promise the opener makes, and how the video pays it back
Hook
An unapologetic, provocative text overlay that establishes a controversial premise as an undeniable fact, immediately challenging the viewer and setting a humorous, absolutist tone.
Payoff
The final rule is delivered as the ultimate truth, concluding the lecture and leaving the audience with the most debatable point to discuss.
[08]
Narrative framework
The structural pattern this video runs on
Framework
The Absolutist Lecture
To present a subjective list of controversial opinions as objective, non-negotiable rules in a mock-serious lecture format, using a countdown to build anticipation and engagement.
- 1
The Thesis Declaration
The creator formally introduces the topic of the list with a title card, establishing the structure and theme of the 'lecture'.
- 2
The Countdown Gauntlet
A repeating sequence where each item on the list is presented and justified, following a consistent micro-pattern. The countdown format (e.g., 5 to 1) systematically builds suspense towards the final reveal.
- 3
The Final Verdict
The reveal of the number one item, which serves as the climax of the list. This item is typically the most absolute or controversial, providing the ultimate payoff for the viewer's attention.
Themes
Techniques
Trends
Post caption
I don’t make the rules I just work here . #ted #talk #present #theboys #xyzbca
Text overlays
title · throughout
If your girl does any of these it's cheating. Sorry I don't make the rules
title · beginning
5 Things that count as cheating By That Zona Guy
informational · beginning
5. Answering DMs at all
informational · middle
4. Accepting drinks from other men
informational · middle
3. Hanging out with any man 1-on-1 Excluding fathers, brothers, cousins & uncles
informational · middle
2. Posting thirst traps
informational · end
1. Any interaction with an ex
Transcript
Today we have five things that count as cheating. Number five, answering DMs at all. Some guy answers your girl's DMs and she just even likes the message. Or a rank. Cheating. Number four, accepting drinks from other men. I got money. You need money for rank. Ask me. Number three, hanging out with any man one on one excluding fathers, brothers, cousins, or uncles. Shouldn't be hanging out with any fucking guy one on one. I don't care if he's your fucking guy friend. He's like a better. You've known him for fucking eighty seven years. No. No. No. Posting thirst rank. Pretty self explanatory. And number one, any interaction with an ex. If your exes reach out to you, don't answer. See your ex in public. Hey. Bye.