Satirical creator income report monologuefrom @nmillz

Transcript

Better talk about how much money I made as a full time content creator in the month of September. I used to think these videos were super vulnerable and weird, but I think financial transparency is so important in an industry like this, especially if you're trying to get into content creation. My first category is selling my followers private and sensitive information. Yes, essentially, every time I get a new follower, I run their data through a program that mines for information like their address, city that they live in, occupation, marital status, lifestyle habits, height, weight, gender, etcetera. All of that information is sent to companies worse. It's all automated by AI, so I don't have to do any of the heavy lifting. That total was $13,980 for the month of September. Next category is my Etsy shop. I run a little side business side hustle where I practice witchcraft on Etsy. This month, we were able to hex and poison nine different clients. This does not include the custom voodoo doll order I received. Adding everything up, this reached $3,000 this month. My next category is in person events. So this is essentially where I show up at my followers doors and beg for money. This is a category I think I could definitely put more effort into. I think it's an area that my business is lacking. Total for this month was $190. This month, I did a livestream with clavicular in Miami. We do a revenue split of $60.40. He takes more because I'm gay. After hotels, flights, and other expenses, I earned 31¢ from the livestream. My next category is typical brand deals. We all know how these work. I post sponsored content for a brand. In the month of September, I actually paid $15,000 to not post any brand deals because I didn't have time. My final category is stocks and other investments. I only invest in defense contracting companies like Lockheed Martin. My stocks there appreciated roughly $400,000 this month. When calculating my total income for the month of September, keep in mind all of these payments and transactions were completed in untaxable methods under the table table or with cash, bringing my total income for the month of September to an undisclosed amount. So proud of myself. I made a killing this month, literally. Thank you guys for watching, and stay tuned for more financial content.