Funny stories about having fake hipsfrom @veronafarrell_

Transcript

10 things about having a fake hip that would put a girl with the real hips into a coma. Sex positions. I can't do all of them. It's very unusual for, like, someone at 21 to get a new hip. But I was randomly in this, room with a girl who was also getting a new hip at, like, 21. She was nuts. She was fucking hilarious. And one day one day the doctor the doctor used to do his daily checkups after we got our new hips and he would come in and be like, oh, what's the crack? Do you have any questions? Are you okay? And she asked him, like, totally serious, when can I do doggy? And he was like, what? She's like, it says in the pamphlet, like, I can have sex after six weeks. Best, you know, like, doggy is like a weight bearing position because I would have to put weight through my hips. So, like, like, when can I do that? She just wanted to no, do I, set off the security, in the airport, like, when you go through the metal better? And the answer is yes. I used to think I'd have to, like, carry around my x-ray better you don't need to, you just go to the site. And then it's always like quite funny because it like goes bananas when it like scans here. Now I just can only fly business class if it's like a long haul flight, which is obviously hilariously glamorous tier really fucking expensive rank like limits like the trips that I can go on because it's just not worth like being sore after like ten hours of sitting down. Standing for too long and sitting for too long are like the problems. So I remember I was going on like a really long haul flight. I told my physio that I was like really stressed and really nervous about like being really sore when I got there. And he looked at me and he said, Verona, can you afford business class? And And I mean it was for a job. I was getting paid for it. So I was like, yeah. And he was like, that's what you're gonna have to do. I have like big mama scars. So you can kind of see, there's a couple I have a couple of them. But they're fucking huge better only one of them is from the actual hip replacement and I think that's my smallest scar. So yeah. I'm like the least physically active person that I know. I played tennis for two hours, this week and I fainted and puked and a doctor had to come. So I had nerve damage and my Catholic parents and my granddad brought me to Knock. Knock is a religious place in Ireland where apparently there was an apparition. So, like, the Virgin Mary, I think it was, apparently appeared in front of a whole church of people. So I went in a wheelchair and then, like, all the people in wheelchairs, like, sit at the front of the church and then, like, this huge group of, like, priests, I don't know where the fuck they get them, they're all really young, I remember, come around and, like, bless all of the injured people. Anyway, my, nerve damage healed itself two months later. Best saying. Whether the Knock trip healed me or didn't or whether there is higher powers or there's not, I'm glad I went. Might as well try. Now I don't walk with a limp or, like, any, like, obvious deformity, which if the nerve damage had stayed, I would have. Shoes are a fucking problem in my life, generally. I have to just be like really careful about, what shoes I'm wearing rank if they have like support. So sexy.