Anecdotes challenge gender stereotypesfrom @amandaaafowler

Transcript

Boys are not easier to raise because this year, I have one son in kindergarten and one son in preschool. And the other day, when we were watching a commercial where a little girl slapped a beast into oblivion to metaphorically represent that she had beat cancer, my youngest turned to me and said, mommy, how do girls get strong? I said, what do you mean, honey? And he repeated the question, how do girls get strong? So I said, well, how do boys get strong? They eat healthy. They move their bodies. They get good sleep. It's the same for girls. I've taken my sons to the gym with me since they were babies. They've seen me lift weights in the backyard. I do flips on the trampoline, throw a fabulous spiral, and occasionally joyfully beat them in wrestling matches. I wondered what this question could possibly be rooted in, so I pried a little. And finally, he said, well, girls are fragile. He's four. Boys are not easier to raise because as a mother who has only ever allowed my son's tears to run freely down their cheeks as opposed to erasing them with the back of my hand, I overheard my four year old tell our little neighbor that boys don't cry. No when not but five minutes better, my son had a meltdown over the fact that his eggs did not have enough pepper on them, I just held him, and I let my deep breath soothe his. Boys are not easier to raise because just yesterday when my husband decided to take our youngest on a solo ice cream date and my oldest discovered that he was not invited, he had a full blown panic attack and started throwing his shoes across the living room and using my body as a punching bag. He's six, and I had to physically restrain his body from hitting and kicking me while repeating, I won't let you hurt my body. I let him cool down and then I told him to clean up his mess. Boys are not easier to raise because no matter how many times I say there are consequences to your actions rank for consent or my husband and I teach them to respect others or that boys are allowed to cry or that girls and boys are equally fragile and strong, there will always be boys at school and at the playground who are not taught the same. And while I am committed to raising boys who become men, who women feel safe around, there will always be an outside influence that I will have to work tirelessly against in raising my boys until we collectively commit to a world with better boys.